Zeno Izen for President 2012… my agenda: “The Plan”

Hi, my name is Zeno Izen and I am running for President of the United States of America.  I have developed a simple plan to restore freedom, peace and prosperity to America.  Here is that plan:

Step 1:  Every U.S. citizen with a Social Security number will receive, by U.S. Postal mail, an unactivated plastic debit card.  The details of the accounts that these cards will access are a technical matter that will be worked out before this plan is implemented.

Step 2:  Citizens will have a short period of time to activate these debit cards, and the accounts that they access.

Step 3:  At an appointed moment, which may or may not be revealed in advance, each citizen’s account will be credited with a sum of money.  The amount of money is a technical detail that will be worked out before this plan is implemented.  Hypothetically, the amount is mostly irrelevant, though it will need to be significant enough to qualify as a windfall for the average citizen.  Numbers between $10,000 and $100,000 are probable.

Step 4:  The U.S. federal government will cede power to the States, and declare itself dissolved.

Step 5:  A period of adjustment will ensue.

See, I'm practically a centrist.

The benefits of this plan will be many.  The velocity of money, and the vitality of the economy will increase dramatically as citizens will be motivated to spend what money they have as soon as possible before its value drops to zero.  All sides of political debate will be satisfied by this plan as well, as redistributionists on the left will be directly compensated and minarchists on the right will see their domestic agenda implemented in full.

At the same time, the results of this plan will be unpredictable to the degree that manipulators of the economy, along with entrenched totalitarian interests, will not be able to fully retain their power.  Prices and currencies will swing to extremes as the results of this plan ripple across the globe.  Innovators and small time players will find themselves knee deep in opportunities, which will disrupt society and make resources newly available in the fairest way possible:  according to wit and competitivity.

My plan will initiate a new global golden era based on merit and voluntary association.  This is what everyone wants, perhaps excluding those deeply invested in the status quo.

So vote for me for President of the U.S. or whatever other office you want.  I ain’t on the ballot and my budget is zero, but I’ve got a slogan and it is thus:

“Vote for Zeno Izen motherfuckers!  He’s got the Plan!”

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World War Two ration stamp booklet

Every Friday I will upload scans and photos of items in my collectibles inventory.  Many of these items will be listed at http://www.bonanza.com/booths/zenoizen

Front of book.

War ration books are fairly common items in antique stores and on eBay.  But, because they are printed on cheap paper, they tend to be in terrible condition and they also often have many of their stamps removed.

This booklet is in pretty good shape, though.

Some of the stamps inside the booklet.
Back of the book.

Biblical God as Central Planner

Here’s something I don’t get.  Maybe someone can explain it to me.

As a generalization, both scientific atheists and Abrahamic monotheists tend to be inconsistent when it comes to their preferences of socioeconomic organization.  Most of your central planners in history seem to have been atheists–Marxism and communism are definitely atheistic systems.  And most of those who still stick with these concepts in the modern era also seem to be atheists.  Your Christian left-anarchist is an anomaly.  Liberal Democrats I suspect–I haven’t looked up the stats–have more atheists, or at least agnostics among them.  And it’s my perception that Liberal Democrats tend to be more liberal in their religious belief and believe that evolutionary theory is true.  I base this perception on the fact that Liberal Democrats take the non-religious side of the abortion discussion.  That alone indicates a liberality in religious belief.  But yet, Liberal Democrats tend to be less friendly with free market ideas, more open to state programs, and generally more on the central-planning side of the economic discussions.

Or maybe none of us are really thinking for ourselves.

Meanwhile, more conservatives (whether Conservative Republicans, or otherwise) are religious, and conservatively so.  I’d point to the abortion discussion again to support this assertion.  And, again, conservatives have a greater tendency to be free market oriented, rhetorically if not in actual fact.  This can be seen in a rough sort of way by comparing various elected persons’ party affiliation with their position on the funding of various governmental (and non-military) projects, such as universal health care, welfare programs, student loans and so on.

I’ll skip over the rest of the logical development and give you my central point: in America, a substantial number of non-religious people have faith in centrally planned civilization while a substantial number of religious people are opposed to central planning, and presumably believe in the power of emergent market processes to create an organized society.

This seems inconsistent to me.  To be religious, by which I mean to believe in a single scriptural god, tends to deny the emergent processes of nature.  If God is the decision maker for all reality, and evolutionary theory is not true, then emergent market processes are anomalous.  Why would markets be able to find equilibrium, and develop into non-planned organization when the rest of nature does not do the same thing?

And to be non-religious tends to accept evolutionary theory–a concept which describes a natural world full of life that has come about without intent or central planning.  Why in a world where life emerges in the absence of a supernatural director would we insist upon fallible human beings to design and execute our economy?

To my point of view, and regardless of your religious beliefs, I would expect that you either believe in orderly emergence or you don’t.  I can understand believing in a perfect God that micromanages reality and how that is consistent with free market beliefs, but I don’t see how you can then throw out evolutionary theory.  And I can see how you can see the natural world as a beautiful orderly accident without a god, but I don’t see how you can then allow imperfect and corruptible human beings take charge of an economy, which is often as complex as any ecosystem.

10 protest-sign slogans scientifically designed to change the world

You know, a good slogan can change the world.  And since these Wall Street protests have been said to have no clear message, this may be a rare opportunity to inject some distilled wisdom into the minds of the masses.

Not just any slogan will do.  There is a subtle art to creating the cyanide-tipped word bullets that get seriously complex messages over noisy channels in short time.  This is the kind of thing you want to leave to certified experts such as myself.

What follows are some slogans that I have developed using a variety of tools and principles developed from my extensive study of linguistics, public relations, poetry, rhetoric, hypnosis, psychology and a great variety of other subjects.  This is top grade verbal technology.  Don’t mess with it, just use it.  It’s powerful and it works.

Now, when you put one of these slogans on your sign, you want to make sure your writing is clear and sense can be made of it from a hundred yards or more.  You don’t want to just scribble the words on a flap of cardboard and call it good.  And if you make your sign and it turns out to be sloppy, do it over.

Remember, most modern people are used to slick graphics designed by trained professionals.  You don’t want your sign to be entirely perfect.  A little folksy amateurism will actually serve your purposes better.  But sheer half-assedness will discredit you immediately.  There’s a sweet spot.  Try to find it.

So then, here you go, ten protest sign slogans scientifically designed to change the world:

1.  UTOPIAN projects ALWAYS create HELL
2.  Banks + Govt = Misery
3.  TOO FUCKED TO BAIL
4.  Are you a producer or a thief?
5.  Central Banks – Central Terror
6.  Recriminalize Fraud
7.  Goldman Sachs has a gambling problem
8.  Free money hurts the poor
9.  Reset America
10.  Defenestrate Oligarchical Collectivism

and as a bonus, one all purpose slogan for all places and all times:

11.  RULED BY NONE