You know, a good slogan can change the world. And since these Wall Street protests have been said to have no clear message, this may be a rare opportunity to inject some distilled wisdom into the minds of the masses.
Not just any slogan will do. There is a subtle art to creating the cyanide-tipped word bullets that get seriously complex messages over noisy channels in short time. This is the kind of thing you want to leave to certified experts such as myself.
What follows are some slogans that I have developed using a variety of tools and principles developed from my extensive study of linguistics, public relations, poetry, rhetoric, hypnosis, psychology and a great variety of other subjects. This is top grade verbal technology. Don’t mess with it, just use it. It’s powerful and it works.
Now, when you put one of these slogans on your sign, you want to make sure your writing is clear and sense can be made of it from a hundred yards or more. You don’t want to just scribble the words on a flap of cardboard and call it good. And if you make your sign and it turns out to be sloppy, do it over.
Remember, most modern people are used to slick graphics designed by trained professionals. You don’t want your sign to be entirely perfect. A little folksy amateurism will actually serve your purposes better. But sheer half-assedness will discredit you immediately. There’s a sweet spot. Try to find it.
So then, here you go, ten protest sign slogans scientifically designed to change the world:
1. UTOPIAN projects ALWAYS create HELL
2. Banks + Govt = Misery
3. TOO FUCKED TO BAIL
4. Are you a producer or a thief?
5. Central Banks – Central Terror
6. Recriminalize Fraud
7. Goldman Sachs has a gambling problem
8. Free money hurts the poor
9. Reset America
10. Defenestrate Oligarchical Collectivism
and as a bonus, one all purpose slogan for all places and all times:
11. RULED BY NONE